Dilemma of a pregnant Ibu..

Called my parents this morning. 

Well, actually Nazrin was the one who wanted to call his Wan but I took the opportunity to talk to them too.

My mom is still down with fever...*sad*

They stopped by here the other day, on their trip from back home in Alor Star to Atan's house in Ampang during the Chinese New Year holidays.

Mama got sick on the 2nd day they were back home. Since my parents have been taking care of Atan's new baby at her house for the past month, mama had to clean the month-long abandoned house from top to bottom the moment they arrived. She swept and mopped the floor, dusted the furniture, basically spring cleaning the whole house for the baby's sake. She got sick right after that.

This in itself is not new. My mama has been known to work herself sick all the time, especially when her flock gathers at home for holidays or during family gatherings. She always had to be the one to do everything; cook, clean, do laundries, tidy up mess (which to me is quite pointless when you have just about a dozen kids running around all day) and by the end of the day, she'd be bone tired and eventually get sick. It's not like we don't help her with the chores, it's just that she would always do things MORE than each of us combined. 

So, here's my dilemma. I've been planning to have this baby plus spend my confinement period back home. This was the case when I had Shahrin and Nazrin although I only spent a week at home for confinement when I had Shahrin due to him being born earlier than planned. I had him in Taiping and spent most of my confinement time at the hospital where he's at. With Nazrin, Ahmad sent Shahrin and I back to my parents 1 month early (out of fear that Nazrin could be born early too) and I finished my confinement under my parents watchful eyes. 

We had planned the same thing for this baby too since my mama didn't want me to overwork myself taking care of 2 big boys (we could say that I actually have 3 big 'boys' heheh) and a baby plus the usual house chores. I'm supposed to stay focused on healing myself for at least 40 days (the usual confinement period among Malays) by resting, eating a special diet for new mothers and other herbal medicine. I shouldn't be doing anything strenuous like lifting heavy objects or subjecting myself to cold water too often. Mama doesn't trust Ahmad to help me with my usual jobs around the house thus the reason for my spending time at home after having my babies.

Unfortunately, my youngest sister just gave birth back in October last year and she too spent her confinement with my parents. They took care of the baby, her 1st born and herself while she focused on getting better. These days, they are taking care of the baby since my sister has started going back to work and her Indonesian babysitter has gone home with no news when she's coming back to Malaysia. My parents assured me that by the time I'm ready to deliver, my sister would have hired a new sitter and they would be free to take care of me too. 

Today, knowing that my mama is sick, I'm beginning to doubt the idea of going home for this delivery. My parents have spent almost 4 month looking after my sister and her kids. They ARE getting older; Baba would sometimes be bedridden with gout while Mama always have had problems with her aching joints. If I do spend time with them this coming March till maybe around May, I would be burdening them with 4 additional individuals to look after. 3 kids are not easy to handle especially for older folks. Even I have trouble controlling them and I'm their mother who spends 24/7 with them. I don't know if I can impose on my parents with my flock so soon after they had to look after my sister's flock. If my sister hadn't had her baby first, then it would've been a different story all together.

BUT........

I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE MY CONFINEMENT HERE! due to several emotional issues.

So, what should I do? I'm torn between keeping my parents healthy and my issues. 

UGHHHH....     

    

My busy days..

For the past 2 weeks, I've been swamped with assignments, one after another.

Yeah right..there were only three but since I always procrastinate and only get serious when the dateline is like Hellooo!!! TOMORROW!! I've had to stay up late just to finish them off. *sigh*

Seems like I never learn from my mistakes. I do them over and over and over....
A high school motivator once said, "Stupidity is when you repeat your mistakes again and again, expecting different results."

Anyway, I think I'd like to list them just in case anybody who read this blog (local) would like to hire me. *wink wink*

1- I did some data entry for a school teacher who was too busy with other stuff.* Data entry is the simplest job I get and although the pay is small (I usually charge RM0.30/data depending on the difficulty), at least I earn some pocket money for me & my boys.

2- This is the first time I get to do transcribing. A client sent me a CD with a 50min video in it and instructed me to write down everything that was said in the video. I was stupid enough to think that "Well, it's just 50 min, that's not gonna take long to finish.." and took my time doing it till 2 days before the dateline. Hahah..I finally had to stay up all night the night before I had to email the finished document to my client and suffered terribly the whole day. What made this assignment hard was because I had to rewind the video again and again just to really catch the conversation going on in it. All in all, I earned quite a lot for this one (and we celebrated by going to Pizza Hut and had ourselves a set for 2 of the cheesy wedges pizza, will definitely order this again next time we go there) and had secured a contract with this client for more transcribing projects. Alhamdulillah.

3- The last one was a translating project. This one was actually sub-contracted to me by another fellow 'technical writer'. Her son had to be admitted for dengue fever, so she couldn't make the dateline and asked me to cover for her. So, I translated 8 pages of a journal and still waiting for my payment to get through. This project was quite easy enough, so no complaints here.

Personally, I think editing and proofreading is way easier to do than translating but truthfully, each projects comes with their own challenges. I did paraphrasing once and I definitely find this the hardest of all because I have to be very careful with my wordings since I need to keep the context the same, just worded differently. I really struggled with this project but I did get paid quite a lot, so I really shouldn't be complaining. heheh.

Well, today after finishing all my projects, I finally crashed.
I've been sleeping on and off again all day. The boys kept me from having one long break but then again, this is nothing new. Just woke up from my 3rd nap today *grin* and decided to write this post as a reminder to myself to not repeat this mistake again.

* The data entry project was actually eye-opening for me. I found out that in our community, there is a high number of single moms who had to support their children on meager wages. Most of them lost their husbands due to death; medical, accidental, some to divorce (I'm only presuming since they don't have any death certificate attach to their other documents) and there are also grandparents who had to support their grandkids with money doing farming only.

Kind of made me realized just how lucky I am....

I've always wanted one of my own..

And today, I finally got what I wished for!!!

LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!!!!!!!

 Shahrin finally gave me the family portrait I've always longed for when watching movies on the telly and they always put this kind of drawings in it.

Ughh..don't know how to turn it right-side up..

Anyway, the biggest person in this picture is Ahmad, the small one at the top of this neck-tilting drawing is Moi (I'm actually smiling while I'm typing this because you know why? My son actually drew me smaller than how I actually look these days. Is he just trying to please me by drawing his father bigger than I am? hahah) The dude in the red 'shirt' with huge hands is the artist himself (:p) and the dude in yellow is his brother. Notice the pair of legs between them? Shahrin drew those as himself but when he found that the space was not enough, he drew another one beside it. Haha..

This is his second drawing of the day. This is supposed to be Ahmad. 

I can't believe Shahrin actually drew these on his own. Well, he's always shown quite an aptitude for drawing but he has never drawn people before, so these really took me by surprise.

I am soooooo proud of that boy!!!

He has definitely inherited his father's talent in drawing, 

that's for sure. 

I can't wait to see what masterpieces Shahrin will do next.

Nervously wringing my hands..

And not half an hour later, I felt like banging my head on the wall.

All these happened last night, just around 11-12 o'clock. Nazrin was having a good night (read: sleep undisturbed for a long period of time) when he woke up crying and holding his left ear. As usual, as he was sleeping in the swing, I tried rocking him back to sleep. That attempt failed.

So, I picked him up and tried looking into his ear (there's always the concern over insects getting into ears..) with Ahmad's help. We couldn't see anything. Then, Nazrin kind of drifted back to sleep in my arms, so I put him back in the swing. Not 15 minutes later, he woke up again, crying louder this time about how his ear hurts. Thinking that it might be an ant inside his eardrum, I did what my parents usually do when we were young and have insects in our ear (which happened quite often..eicchh..), I dropped some water into his left ear. Which led to him crying even more and causing me to feel like a bad mother for putting him through that. 

I was getting frantic when he kept crying and getting back to sleep at intervals for nearly 40 minutes. I finally gave in and asked Ahmad to drive us to the clinic to get Nazrin's ear checked. Luckily, two of Ahmad's friends were hanging out here, so we left them to look after Shahrin, who blissfully slept through this whole episode. Since all the private clinics were closed, we headed out to our local clinic. They always have someone on standby for emergencies. 

When we got there, the ambulance driver was washing the ambulance (weird much but very helpful) and he told us to call the number of last night's medical officer on duty. Ahmad gave him a call. Poor man* was already asleep but he came pretty quickly since his living quarters was just behind the clinic. Nazrin was quite calm by that time and he didn't cry when the medical assistant checked his ear with that pointy thing with lights at the end (what's it called by the way?).

What did he find? Earwax.

That's right. Nazrin's left ear was full of earwax. Apparently, the earwax had hardened and that had caused him to feel pain which could be due to the pressure buildup within his eardrum or just because hard earwax can cause irritation. HAH! Who knew?

So, he gave us some panadol for the pain and an eardrop to soften up the earwax. And there I was ready to do battle with whatever insect he might have found inside Nazrin's ear. DUH..

After thanking both gentlemen, we headed back home and I kept having this weird feeling that we've been through this before. By the time we arrived, I finally figured out why I felt like this scenario was familiar. Because it was. I think it was last year when we were crashing in at my sister's house (without Ahmad) for a family gathering. The same thing happened then too. Nazrin just got better from a fever and one night he kept crying and holding his left ear. My father took us to the nearest private clinic but the Dr said that there was nothing wrong with Nazrin. I had to beg him to do a more thorough check since I couldn't stand seeing Nazrin cry. He too came to the conclusion that Nazrin's left ear was so full of wax that it was causing him pain. I had foolishly thought that some insect had gotten inside his ear then too. Stupid!

I think I'd be better prepared for next time (if it ever happens again) and will not jump to the same stupid conclusion again. This time around, I think I see the pattern now. It seems that Nazrin can get this same problem again following a fever, which was exactly what happened then and last night. I can't always clean his ears since he'd want to do it himself, which always leads to me telling him no and him crying for not getting his way. Next time, I'll keep an ear-drop ready for such incidence. 

Go read this for info: earwax in children.

At least I'm not completely to blame for his earwax build-up. Heh.

* Thank you so much to En. Sahrun from Klinik Kesihatan Bagan Serai. Sorry for disturbing your sleep. Heh.

    

What do you do when there's nothing to do?

SCARE UP SOME FELT! (sing it like the Happy Monster Band do in Disney Junior)

As promise, this post is about the up-cycling I did for Shahrin's 'new schoolbag' (which should have been completely unnecessary if only I can remember where I stored his old schoolbag...)

Anyhoo..just 3 days to go before school started last week on 4th Jan (why did the Ministry of Education allowed the first day of school to start in the middle of the week anyway? duuhh) and I suddenly remembered that I had Shahrin's old schoolbag stored away. Mind you, even when I have limited spaces to 'store' stuff, I've actually managed to misplace so many things over the years. Signs of my mind getting older and feebler (if that's even a word...) With 2 more days to go and I still couldn't find his bag, I asked Ahmad to buy him a new one with the instruction to not buy something expensive, yet, since we can splurge later next year when he goes to primary school (gasp!!!! my 1st born is almost 7???). Here is what Ahmad came up with:

Plain RM2.00 2nd-hand bag that Ahmad bought at the night market.

It's actually an Allianz bag.

I made this name tag for Shahrin to cover the original logo.
I used 2 sheets of felt; one blue for the letters and a grey sheet for the back piece.

This was done the day before school started which was on Wednesday of last week. I've also made something else out of felt, to put on the front of the bag since it looked too plain. I'm trying to make a felt applique, but it is a bit complicated, plus our little family's current health condition made it impossible to finish it on time. 

This is a downloaded picture, curtsy of Mr. Google that
I printed on a piece of paper as a  template.

This is the half-finished felt version.
A Thomas felt-applique.

They look 'almost' the same, right? 

It's taking way too long to finish up the details. If only I can zoom in closer on these pictures, I can show you just how horrible my stitches are. I'm thinking of buying one of those bigger-sized cross-stitch needle with embroidery floss or something for the lines along Thomas, to make them pop-up more. Regular needle and thread is taking too long plus the thread do not show to much on felt. 

Well, hopefully I can show the end result soon. Till then, toodles. 

Cute pictures plus yesterday's update.

I'm down with fever since last night and today I'm still not feeling so good.

Started feeling sick 3 nights ago (feverish and runny nose) but 2 days ago I felt so much better that I forgot I was sick just the night before. Felt slightly nauseous since morning yesterday & I haven't pooped (sorry hehe but honestly, its not a nice feeling, not going when you need too) since yesterday. Don't know if the constipation was brought on by the fever or the other way around. But as usual, did nothing about it since I felt strong enough to do housework (which never ends *sigh*).

Around 4pm, Ahmad went out as usual for the night market. Luckily, he may have sensed that I'm not feeling well so he offered to take Shahrin along with him. Since a friend of his went with him to help set up the tent and arrange the goods, I happily said ok to the idea. Actually, I was ecstatic over the idea but I didn't show it to him hahah. Never a good idea to make him feel like I'm taking advantage over him :p

So, I had a blissful evening folding the laundry and making a felt project for Shahrin. Oh, shoot! I forgot the before pictures, dang! Oh well...this project will be revealed soon, so check back here often,okay?

Anyhow, when I said blissful, I really meant it because Nazrin slept through the evening, which I am also thankful for. Now, please feast your eyes (sorry in advance for the crappy shots, I only have a phone camera to work with) over these cute pictures of a sleeping prince and his adopted feline brother.

Introducing our 4th child, Kucing (that's Malay for cat)
since no one came up with a proper name for him.

This whole bed is MINE!!!!

2 hours into their nap time.

1/2 hour later.....cute right? hehe

One word to describe 2011.

I wrote a similar post last year, about 2010.

This year, the word would be; THANKFUL.

I wanted to write about this last night as my way of celebrating the new year but the boys had other things in mind. And since this not a good time to be writing either (they are always bugging me about something *sigh*), I'll make this into points,

1- I'm thankful for being alive for 1 more year. To be able to watch my boys grow into the unique individuals they are today.

2- I'm thankful for the writing class I took last year. It made me realized that I still need to learn more about writing in general and the English language in particular.

3- I'm thankful for the references and the recommendations from friends that have helped my little writing service grow. I think I'm going to promote myself as a technical writer from now on, since I don't know what else to call my service.

4- I'm thankful for the 2-month chance at being a working mom. Even though the pay was low, I had fun learning new skills and making new friends.

5- I'm especially thankful for this unplanned pregnancy that came right after I quit my job. Come to think of it, my pregnancy with Nazrin wasn't planned either since we didn't take any family planning medications, same as this time. However, I can't wait to hold this baby come April, insya ALLAH.

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I do want to share something else here, things that happened last Thursday (29/12/11).

Morning
That Thursday morning, I went for my scheduled check-up and an ultrasound scan at our local clinic. Had the usual weigh-in, blood pressure and urine tested which were in the normal range, alhamdulillah. Then, I was directed to the doctor's room for my scan. At first, the doctor measured the baby's length, width and head circumference to check its progress. Thank GOD it was well in the normal range, as oppose to its brothers who were underweight while in the womb. Then, the doctor turned the monitor over so that I can see too.

At the sight of my baby growing in me, I squealed with delight! Ahaha..even the doctor was shocked when I suddenly did that. Who would have thought that even after going through 2 pregnancies, I'd still overreact upon seeing this miracle in me. Unfortunately, this baby has followed in its brothers footsteps whereby we were only given its backside, so I don't know its gender yet. No matter. I would love it just the same, be it a boy or a girl.  

Evening
That evening, Shahrin invited our neighbors' children (a boy and a girl) over to play as I didn't want him to play outside since he'd already bathed. I gave them 3 sets of jigsaw puzzles given to us by one of the children's mother 2 weeks before. The girl (8y.o.) who came immediately recognized them as her brother's sets (they gave us a lot of sets that they were initially going to burn after they had a spring-clean recently) and told Shahrin not to show them to her brother as he is very possessive about his belongings. As they played, I stayed in my room folding laundry while keeping my ears open to their conversations.

Not long afterwards, as it was getting dark, the girl kept saying that she needed to get home soon since her brother (9y.o.) didn't like it when she left him alone for long. (Apparently, he's possessive about his sister too. He's always bossing her around and making her do things his way). What really broke my heart was when she told Shahrin that her brother didn't want her to play with Shahrin anymore. I never said a word while she was talking to Shahrin but just cried softly in my room. Although I doubt that Shahrin really understood what she meant by her little remark, my heart ached for my son. I've forgotten how cruel kids can be even at such a young age.

Then, as they were talking some more, Shahrin said something that made me laugh even after my tears just minutes before. He said that when he's older, he's going to MARRY ME! Ahahhaa..isn't that hilarious? This one I had to intervened so I went out to the living room where they were playing and told Shahrin that he cannot marry me since I'm already married to his father. I also told him that by the time he's older, I would be too old for him anyway. LOL. Then, the boy and girl decided to leave since it was nearly Maghrib, so I was quite relieved to see them go.
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Well, that's about sums up my last year's stories. Hopefully this year will be brighter with another baby and better for all of us.

HAPPY 2012 everybody!